‘gay’… ‘straight’… ‘bi’… they’re all inadequate when your sexual preference is really ‘Dave Foley as a woman.’
marginalutilite: "Have always been wary about how romantic relationships are privileged over other sorts of relationships, leading to the atomization of the ‘nuclear family’ and the death of community.“
That is an apt and pithy way to put that, something I’ve been too prolix about.
We don’t need to justify ourselves to anyone. We don’t need a reason to be queer. Maybe we were born this way, maybe we weren’t. Maybe sexuality is fluid for some people and not for others. It’s totally irrelevant either way. The message we need to send to heterosexists is not that our sexuality was foisted upon us and that they should be ‘tolerant’ and ‘understanding’. The message is: our sexuality is perfectly valid and none of your business, we offer you no excuses, and we are never going away.