My random, unorganized thoughts on this one:
This brings up an interesting point, of the dissonance, or double-bind, that arrises in so many expressions of sexuality, or of gender, or culture, or class, or anything that exists in a relational power structure (which is, arguably, everything): what you like or do likely has more of an impact on (or is more of a reflection of) social relations than you might care to admit.
Flipside: how do we know that what we are drawn to is truly what we like and not at all socially-coerced?
Choosing the things we like based on reactivity to the norm (e.g. indulging in certain sexual practices or whatever because they’re not hetereonormative) is not necessarily the best solution, because it is only reactive and just may be going against your own “nature” (if, again, we even know what that is).
Maybe we should be honest, with ourselves and with others, and always question and analyze our desires and draws; go beyond mere reaction. Flipside: maybe we should not view others’ desire as merely fitting neatly on one side of the conform-to/reaction-against binary or the other.
For the record, I am a proponent of BDSM and in particular for a generally more accepting and less stereotypic cultural understanding of it in its many forms.